Posted by: hmillic | September 12, 2007

Kyla Ebbert: Standing up for Skanky Girls’ Rights Everywhere!

In case you haven’t already heard 23 year-old Kyla Ebbert’s tragic tale of shame and sadness, here’s a re-cap for you, taken from a column in the San Diego Union-Tribune:


Kyla was escorted off a Southwest Airlines flight two months ago for wearing a super short skirt. Ebbert, a Mesa College student and Hooters waitress, was allowed to stay on the plane, but only after she put up a fight and, she says, was lectured on how to dress properly.

She had a doctor’s appointment that afternoon in Tucson, where temperatures had topped 106 all week. She arrived at Lindbergh Field wearing a white denim miniskirt, high-heel sandals, and a turquoise summer sweater over a tank top over a bra.

After the plane filled, and the flight attendants began their safety spiel, Ebbert was asked to step off the plane by a customer service supervisor, identified by the airline only as “Keith.”

They walked out onto the jet bridge, where Keith told Ebbert her clothing was inappropriate and asked her to change. She explained she was flying to Tucson for only a few hours and had brought no luggage.

“I asked him what part of my outfit was offensive,” she said. “The shirt? The skirt? And he said, ‘The whole thing.’ ”

Keith asked her to go home, change and take a later flight. She refused, citing her appointment. The plane was ready to leave, so Keith relented. He had her pull up her tank top a bit, pull down her skirt a bit, and return to her seat.

Southwest explained its treatment of Ebbert in a letter to her mother, saying it could remove any passenger “whose clothing is lewd, obscene or patently offensive” to ensure the comfort of children and “adults with heightened sensitivities.”

Alright. I agree that the flight attendant was completely out of line for what he said/did to Kyla. Since when did airlines start implementing a dress code? I’ve been on MANY a flight where people have got on wearing far worse than what this girl was sporting, and nothing happened to them. Bad taste SHOULD be illegal, but its not. She has the right to wear whatever she wants as long as her bathing suit areas are covered. Southwest should apologize to her and give her some free flights. Heck, maybe even some drink tickets and some wings!! That being said, I hardly think this is worth the national attention. If she had been kicked off the flight, it would be a different story, but she ultimately made it back on the plane. She made it to her mysterious doctor’s appointment. She’s giving interviews left and right like she endured some life-altering trauma. Sweetie, you weren’t asked to sit at the back of the bus. Her mother claims that she was targeted for dressing like “every other college girl across the US,” which I think is hilarious because if I ever wore a number like that around my Mom she’d drop kick me in the throat. She appeared on the Today show wearing the offending outfit to try and prove her case that she was dressed appropriately, and when she stood up, flashed her underwear on national tv. You can see the inteview here. Maybe she bent over and pulled a B. Spears while she was loading her luggage. Seems possible! She’s not totally innocent here, I’m sure there were people that were offended by what she was wearing. Maybe there was some vajeen showing!

No matter what, this girl is milking this publicity for all its worth, and comes out of this a winner. A bunch of Kyla-related facebook groups have sprung up, presumingly started by guys that have tried to friend her on the site, and a Google search of her name yields over 105,000 sources. I give her 2.5 seconds before she’s nekked in Playboy or Maxim. Just wait!

UPDATE: 11.16.07

Man, how good am I?  She took it off for Hef.  New favorite Kyla quote : “Yes, I am a member of the mile high club. And no, it was not on Southwest. It was on a private plane.”  Classy, classy girl!! Your father must be beaming with pride. Joining the club on a private plane is key, only common people get it on flying commercial. The title for her photo spread was “Legs in the Air,” and appears on the Playboy website, also another classy touch. Oh, and last month, Sir Richard Branson invited Kyla to come party in Vegas to celebrate the first flight of the Virgin America fleet. There’s talk of her being featured in commercials now. Gag me, please. What did I tell you though? Milking those 15 minutes for everything they’re worth with those fun bags!

I still think she’s a butterface and TOTALLY rough looking. What do you think, if her tats weren’t freakishly large would you think she was a knockout?


  1. Hi…I just found your blog today and have laughed out loud so many times that you have made it into my favorite places. I was reading your blog on the “Too Short Skirt” girl and I completely agree with you. I think she will end up with some company. I am curious though…why was she going to the doctor’s in Arizona?

  2. Thanks so much, that’s quite a compliment! I’m really glad you enjoyed it!

    My guess is she was maybe getting a check up with her plastic surgeon, the fun bags look freshly installed!

  3. *chuckle* about the underwear.

    Also if you read the statement that the airline put out, they were just responding to complaints from other passengers.

  4. Yeah I figured as much, the dude wouldn’t have said something to her otherwise!

  5. I heard she was flashing her coochie to the other passengers. didn`t have on any undies and her monkey was hanging out. Throw kyla from the plane. I hope her plastic surgeon does something with her hideous face soon. she`s a double bagger in my book lol. and she`s a HOOTERS WAITRESS???? I didn`t see any HOOTERS?? I bet thats what the doctors appointment was for. her new name will soon be SILICONE SALLY.

  6. Kyla Ebbert Playboy video here:

  7. You Win! She made it to Playboy. Yes, she’s a skank but you’re right. If it was illegal to be skanky at least half the female population would be in prison and the world would be a much duller place.
    I’ve flown SWA many times and I doubt if there was even one time that at least one skank wasn’t onboard. It’s a budget airline for Christ’s sake. I’ve been on delayed flights where the entire passenger contingent was drunk from all the free booze SWA flight attendants plied us with (SW used to be famous for its liberal alcohol policies particularly if a plane was delayed).

  8. Skank is right. The whole thing smells of someone desperately seeking attention. First she shows her crotch to anyone who she could get to look on the plane, then on national television. Now she takes it all off and shares her sexcapades with the world. This one has desperate written all over her.

    Let’s just hope the tramp takes the money from Playboy and spends it on a nose job which she really does need.

  9. Funbags… oh yes. Maybe I hang around with some strange men, but I have never met a man who actually thought fake boobs were anything resembling fun. Quite repellant, in fact…

    Heartening, no?

    It is so, so wrong that I heard about this story in Australia. I feel so dirty.

    You are hereby stamped with the seal of funny.

  10. I got some black wrinkles in my left and write corner of my nose, i dono how am going to clear with in my next fashion competition in next weak now am need of some suggestions for my nose

  11. […] Skirtgate? Southwest Airlines escorted a young woman off a plane because they didn’t like the shortness […]

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